It's time I rebooted my system starting afresh, http://lastly-dispirited.blogspot.com
Profile daniel ng, 14.10.94 http://www.facebook.com/ngyjd.3 http://baby-drummer23.deviantart.com drums; photography; design; pool; gym. victorian slave; 4C. Band Geek no more. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Tagboard Tagboard Ads Exits adeline ahdes annabella's shop anna anne ashraf audrey azalea ben bertrand celine christopher colleen colin collin crystal clarice daniel daniel chia david SG david;brother darren debbie deborah denise engchuan elvina felicia gabriel[vs] gabriel jac janeen jeff jerlynn jesper joel jong jianjun kai juan karen kelly liang zhi liyan mandie marie marcus meizhi melinda melissa natalie nicole qianying rachel rayson rifdi ryan sam.p samantha wong sarah serene shabbna shafeeq shaun sheldon siRong siewting solihin stephanie veronica weining weeqin wenya yixiang youth ministry! yuzhen Archives November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 December 2010 Credits ©Glamouresque.	Sunday, June 15, 2008 renewal For those of you who are unaware, I have been in church camp for the past 4 days, and man has it been tiring. To sum up this whole camp in one word, I would say it was "renewal". Ever since i've been drifting away from God from the beginning of the Sec 1 era, my life's really been turning into a complete mess-up. The camp for me was like building a ten-story card house. First, you start off slow and steady, then you begin to get more adventurous and build faster. But when it comes to the last two cards at the very top you get too excited and you screw your whole tower up as you place the final two in place. But for that split second where those two last cards actually balanced at the top, ecstasy. That breath inhaled in is only there for such a short while, so short that there's not enough time to cherish that moment. Well my tower falling down was due to various reasons. Some people, simply are just hypocrites. Sure they act so touched and devoted during the worships but when it's sleeping time, metamorphosis takes place. That seemingly "beautiful" creature turns into a monster. I couldn't stand it any longer I had to resort to violence. It's been a long time since I blew over. And that last time wasn't a very pleasant sight. But lucky for me I guess I managed to control myself a little better this time. I didn't really hurt the guy, just choked him up a little bit, but I think the "explicit" language could've been avoided. I really hate it when that other side of me comes out. I don't want to be reminded of the past any more, and I was hoping so deeply that this camp would help me forget about the dark past. But no, it possibly made it more memorable. I lost track of who I was, or who I am right now. I really gotta' start to wake up from this daze and snap back to reality. The weight's getting too much too handle for me right now, but still I guess the camp really helped me out with my relationship with God again. I was drifting away, further and further as each day died and a new one was born. That bond wasn't there any more. But this camp made a difference, it sorta' reminded me that i'm still not alone. HE's always in me and he forever will be. I actually wrote diary entries on the first and second day but it was really too late for me to write on the third and forth day. It ain't really the same thing as blogging but I guess it's pretty similar. I'll scan in the first entry later on. Though I will remember each day with such pleasant and also abhorrent memories, they will be engraved in my mind. This path that Glenn Lim went down. I'm afraid I might slip on to that path and never get back. I gotta' come back to my senses or i'll be gone. Thought i've been so tired out, this camp has really inspired me to do more than just talk, but also to start action. I gotta' dump that bunch of "friends". Vice ain't an option for me at this point of time. And yet obsessions are soon becoming one. There are too many things going around in my life right now. It's really going to get messier by the second if I don't do anything about it. Clean it up, or the net's going to break and I really will snap. I'm losing it soon. And by the way the picture of the cross and the staircase was taken today while I was like spending time at the rooftop just wandering for a reason. Feel bad about skipping the whole sermon. But yeah I guess that time alone up there made me realise a few bits and pieces of revelations and gifts. Drums are the only things that seem to work out much for me. It brings me to a whole new place I guess. Just jamming along to music really helps me out with troubles. If my drums were people they'd be pretty sore now anyway. Argh, I hate being labelled. Especially when people really don't know you. When will people stop thinking i'm emo? I hate emos. What's wrong with just spending time alone. I just like to do that to reflect kay? Yeah so that's something I got to clarify. I'm just not myself around church people I guess. If I were I might freak some people out. Ugh, i'm really losing my energy. I need to wake up. Replenish me.
I'm coming back with a goal and nothing is gonna' stop me.