It's time I rebooted my system starting afresh, http://lastly-dispirited.blogspot.com
Profile daniel ng, 14.10.94 http://www.facebook.com/ngyjd.3 http://baby-drummer23.deviantart.com drums; photography; design; pool; gym. victorian slave; 4C. Band Geek no more. 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Tuesday, August 10, 2010 demon I wanna' fly. I'm poor, not financially but in other aspects, probably lacking in maturity. Lacking the understanding of the value of my possessions. I gotta' take a step back, and take a look at things from afar, see things from a wider perspective. Just look at what I'm posting this entry with, a MacBook. Some people don't even have computers, hah. And I'm only speaking in terms of the living standards in Singapore. How do we measure fortune? Definitely without taking into account all the physical objects in our lives like our houses, our beds, our allowance, does all that really matter? Until technology comes up with some way to measure one's felicity, I guess the only one who can really tell how fortunate you are is none other than yourself. If you aren't willing to die for anything in your life, is there really a point in living? Hypocrisy can only hide you for so long, there comes a point where everybody has to find themselves, discover what they really have in their lives, what they really long for. Self-consciousness is definitely a weakness in the human mind, anxiety about what peers think about your outward appearance, about your social status and what not. I can only hope that I will learn to grow out of that one day. To live in a world where everybody is comfortable without having masks on, no fronts put on. That would be the world. All progress is precarious, and the solution of one problem brings us face to face with another problem. Martin Luther King, Jr. Beat of the Day: Waterfall - Gavin Degraw Monday, August 9, 2010 singapore On a brighter note, Happy Birthday Singapore! Hah, I almost forgot. charity You know your parents don't know you when: 1. The only thing they can talk to you about is how little they see you study and how ugly my face is. 2. They think you're interested in something you tell them you're not. 3. They look at jewels more than you. 4. They don't know how seriously you take some of your interests. If you're wondering what the heck I'm talking about in 3, well, I'm talking about bejeweled. By totaling the number of star medals they got, I'd say they played about 4000+ games altogether, and 1 game lasts a minute, with an additional 5 seconds for that "final hurrah" thing. So 65 multiplied by 4000 would give you a total of 260,000 seconds, which gives you about 4334 minutes which equates to 72 hours, which is 3 whole freaking days. Can you imagine playing the same thing on a handphone for 72 hours? From the virgin hours of the morning to the dead hours of the night, all I hear is "1 minute, GO". Followed by "shing, shing, zap zap zap". Wonderful isn't it? How the hell would you know how much I'm studying when you barely even see me at all? How certain are you that you can say you see me for more than 2 hours straight everyday, not counting the time when I'm asleep. And you make all these claims that you don't see me studying at all, you don't see me putting in any effort. If that's the case, you probably don't think God is real since you can't see him either huh? I know what I want for myself, I don't exactly appreciate you telling me what I should be interested in, because that just doesn't flow y'know? Sorry for so much angst in this post, I know this is suppose to be a blog of "new direction" and more euphoric posts, but everyone needs to let of some steam every once in awhile don't they? I wish I had my drums, but guess what, refer to no. 4! Beat of the Day: 83 - John Mayer Saturday, August 7, 2010 Yay. I like to think of it not as a drawing, call it a "visual diary" if you may. I don't know, but for some reason, I've been lost for words lately. Click on the drawing and go scrutinize every single detail you can find ;D Beat of the Day: Not Afraid - Eminem Wednesday, August 4, 2010 FOLs You can't all pretend That you don't know enough Enough to make sense All this will be gone And you can sink beneath The rapture we've spawned Everybody seems to be having life problems these days, maybe if everybody realizes we're all going through our own warped dimension of troubles, we'll stop trying to gain sympathy from our peers and we'll all just gladly receive the pain. What the hell am I talking about, this is supposed to be a happy blog, hah. C'mon people, you're not the only one going through troubles, everyone's probably experienced lows in some point of their life, be it whether they lost a couple of dollars, or got kicked out of school, or internal family issues, we've seen them all haven't we? Sometimes nobody can help us, and all those "comforting" words blurted out by our friends seem to be so perfect to the extent that it seems like it's a script. Like there's a drawer full of consoling essays labelled "comfort saddened friends" or something. Friendship consolidates one's emotional endurance, but I guess it can only give aid to you in certain ways. Smile people, we're all living under the same sky. Beat of the Day: Floods - Fightstar Tuesday, August 3, 2010 exculpate Somehow I just knew I'd get that reception. I guess I can't do anything now can I? Beat of the Day: Fiction - Avenged Sevenfold Monday, August 2, 2010 wistful I still think about you almost everyday... I feel so helpless whenever I wonder how you're coping with things, whether or not I should even try to talk to you. Each time I feel like I should, I can't help but think that I'd be pushed away, for whatever deeds I did wrong. Is it wrong to miss you? Missing what we used to share? Penny for your thoughts, I sure wish there was a rewind button in life, but then again... Doesn't everybody? Life would be so meaningless if you could do things without consequences eh? I just find it so annoying when I think I'm through with all of it, and then a random action just brings all the memories back, I guess there'll always be that little box where the feelings we shared will be kept for a pretty long time and it could be opened any time. Just when I had you off my head Your voice comes thrashing wildly through my quiet bed You say you want to try again But I've tried everything but giving in. I bought a ticket on a plane And by the time it landed, you were gone again I love you more than songs can say But I can't keep running after yesterday. Man, is that appropriate or what... Guess it earned the spot of, Beat of the Day: All We Ever Do Is Say Goodbye - John Mayer Heh, I've been listening to him a whole lot lately, good stuff good stuff. Sunday, August 1, 2010 roses Stop this train I want to get off and go home again I can't take the speed it's moving in I know I can't but honestly won't someone stop this train. Haven't had much time for the past couple of days but friday night was a pretty fun night at the art exhibition. Went back to school yesterday morning to sit for the mock E-math paper, and tuition afterwards. Had a test in there too, and damn... I couldn't complete a single question. Demoralizing... Beat of the Day: Dreaming With A Broken Heart - John Mayer
I'm coming back with a goal and nothing is gonna' stop me.